Spill Awards 2012

You are cordially invited to join us for this year’s Spill Awards this evening at 8 pm GMT at the secret RR Conspiracy Base on the Moon. Yknow, where we hatch all the sinister plans to determine who gets picked for the Playlist for our own sinister ends. The Bavarian Illuminati got nuthin’ on us…


And the winners are…

Hero of the Year: 3rd Mo Farah; 2nd Sir Bradley Wiggins; 1st Malala Yousafzai

Unsung Heroes: Camila Batmanghelidjh; Alex Flynn; Jess (DarceysSis); Steenbeck

Villain of the Year: 3rd Lance Armstrong; 2nd Cameron, Osborne and Gove; 1st Jimmy Saville

Non-Event of the Year: Elections for Police & Crime Commissioners

Event of the Year: 3rd US Presidential Election; 2nd Olympics Opening Ceremony; 1st The London Olympics

RR and Spill Awards: AngryIrishPunk as Rookie of the Year; SaneShane as Artist of the Year; He Said/She Said as Spill Series of the Year; Special Self-congratulatory award to the entire RR Community for soldiering on regardless.

TV Show of the Year: 3rd Fresh Meat; 2nd The Thick of It; 1st The Bridge

Film of the Year: 3rd The Muppets; 2nd Skyfall; 1st Amour

Album of the Year: 3rd equal Tame Impala with Lonerism, Alabama Shakes with Boys and Girls and Godspeed You! Black Emperor with Hallelujah! Don’t Bend Ascend; 2nd Mark Lanegan Band with Blues Funeral; 1st Richard Hawley with Standing at the Sky’s Edge.



249 thoughts on “Spill Awards 2012

  1. Ladies and gentlemen. Friends. It gives me great pleasure to welcome you to this year’s fabulous Spill Awards, in which once again we demonstrate what a remarkably eclectic bunch of people who take this sort of thing far too seriously for our own good we are. The nominations have been fixed, the ballot boxes have been stuffed, the votes have been ignored and the gurus have favoured their own special friends as usual, and so I’m delighted to welcome, to make the first awards of the evening, the Doyenne of RR: TreeFrog Demon!

  2. *hisses at assistant in the wings*
    Is my tiara on straight?

    Ladies and er…

    unaccustomed as I am to public speaking,I…oh no, that was last night

    It is indeed an honour and a privilege to be wafting among you on this most celebrated occasion

  3. I forgot to say, these are the results of the voting for Hero Of The Year! Yay ! ! !

    *waves gold envelope*

    Now, in reverse order, I’m happy to announce that the winners are

  4. Sorry about that – phone call from Mrs Abahachi, who’s visiting her mother in Wales, and had somehow completely forgotten about this evening’s event.

  5. in third place, the man who does that extraordinary thing with his hands over his head – yes, ladies and gents, the very wonderful MO FARAH ! ! !
    and in second place, though his sideburns are always well to the fore…BRADLEY WIGGINS!

  6. Right. calm down you lot – the moment you’ve all been waiting for – and I hope they’ve managed to hook you up to the ‘Spillcast dear, since I know you can’t be with us tonight on account of the assassination attempt

    oh, have I given it away?

    yes it’s the very lovely HERO OF THE YEAR…MALALA YOUSAFZAI!

    Get well soon ! ! ! We’re rootin’ for ya !

  7. *rapturous applause*

    Phew! That was a bit of a thrill, wasn’t it, everybody! Now, please calm down…not now, llamalpaca…

    for I am about to hand you over, in the interests of good taste and the Unsung Hero Of The Year Award, to the very lovely

    MNEMONIC ! ! ! Hooray ! ! !

  8. It gives me great pleasure to introduce a hastily round-up but in no way inadequate replacement, on account of Mnemonic’s modem having had a few problems this evening…

  9. Hello everybody. As my scintillatingly erudite posts always get the most recommends of anyone on your poxy little blog, it seems only appropriate that I should be invited here to dispense some rather pointless little awards, as nominated by you, the humble denizens of Readers Flounce. Ah yes, the Can’t Imagine Why They’re Unsung Heroes…

  10. Mrs Maki and I came in with the headphones on grooving away to next week’s A and B lists, having been (almost) politely requested by a certain uniformed lackey to pay more attention, we take our rather plush seats and settle down for a stress free evening not having been nominated in any category as far as we know.

  11. As nominated by someone I can’t actually recall being rude to at any point called GlassHalfEmpty: Camila Batmanghelidjh for her brave and wonderous work with the disadvantaged black kids of south London. While others pontificate about the big society, broken Britain, child poverty targets, gang culture, and all the rest, she risks her life every day trying to save those that have seen society walk by on the other side.

  12. As nominated by DarceysDad: Jess (DarceysSis) for her academic and musical efforts being rewarded with her grammar school place and Royal Albert Hall show respectively. Mush.

  13. And troll of the year is? The one that doesn’t realise that no matter if they don’t give an email address their IP address does show up. What fun we could have with that (even if it is refreshable).

  14. And finally, as nominated by Spotted Richard, Steenbeck for going through weeks without electricity during tropical storm Sandy, working, raising kids, cooking amazing meals and still managing to write the most wonderful blog.

    Okay, on to the Llama for my award. Villain of the Year. Don’t say you weren’t all thinking it.

  15. Our next award is for Villain Of The Year. A casual look at the events of 2012 would alert Spillers to what is a bumper year for villainy – truly we have been spoiled for choice. Why even this very night we have a knob-end trying to barge into the reckoning.

    If your name’s not on the door you’re not getting in.

  16. In third place – rather surprisingly I might say – is a man who successfully pulled the wool over the eyes of an adoring public for years. He used to love hanging round hospitals and made an unholy song and dance about his charity works. It seems we only saw the good in him, while all the time he was living a lie and deceiving the most vulnerable in society: impressionable young people, politicians, journalists and the like.

  17. It’s not as if there weren’t suspicions as to what he was up to – this quote from Stephanie McIlvain in 2004 sums it up

    So many people protect him it’s just sickening…. The part that pisses me off about the whole thing, even if we were close right now, is how many people he’s given false hope to. I think that is the most disgusting thing ever.

  18. Now Lance can’t be here to accept the award tonight which is a real shame as he’s going to need something to replace that massive empty space on his wall where the seven Tour De France maillots jaunes useta be. Personally I think he should have picked up a lifetime achievement award. Make that seven of them – for balance.

  19. In second place we have a three-way tie – seems strange that The Three Stooges will have share this, when they seem less than keen on sharing anything else. I’m just sorry, so sorry that as usual they couldn’t accommodate their FibDem Etonian mucker. Second place goes to TweedleDave Tweedle Deficit and TweedleDumbass better known to you as………

  20. In first place – rather unsurprisingly I might say – is a man who successfully pulled the wool over the eyes of an adoring public for years. He used to love hanging round hospitals and made an unholy song and dance about his charity works. It seems we only saw the good in him, while all the time he was living a lie and deceiving the most vulnerable in society: impressionable young people, politicians, journalists and the like.

  21. It’s not as if there weren’t suspicions as to what he was up to – that mild mannered magician Jerry Sadowitz had him sussed as far back as 1987.[There, happy now Severin ? ! ! ]

  22. It was a fine late effort by The Troll, but the judges were left unimpressed by the way he cowered when he realised that his IP address had been identified. It’s often better to just be an anonymous loser.

    • How long have you got, TFD? It *is* supposed to be DsD at this point, but since we’re running at least half an hour late, as is traditional…

      • Problem was, I hadn’t been sent the full running order – only that llamalpaca was going to hand over to me and I was going to hand over to DsD. So when the llama handed over to DsD…you see where I’m going here? So I just panicked, because of the babysitting. Sorry!

      • I did briefly consider deliberately sabotaging the running order, to create the authentic Mick Fleetwood and Sam Fox vibe, but decided to trust to the general tendency of things to tend towards entropy.

  23. I hate to be a wet blanket, but I think Mrs Abahachi is planning to phone back at 9 to let off steam about her mother, along other things. Can we move it along, people?

  24. OK, in the absence of…

    Darlings, I’m afraid someone’s been topping up my glass with champers instead of the mineral water I asked for…half a mo…


    …no. not Mo Farah, silly…

  25. * sees the Prof doing the speed-up motion in the wings *

    Right, er, OK …

    We now come to a pair of awards: first of all is the Spill Award for Non-Event Of The Year

    Um, if any of you want to go get a toilet or bar-break, I think now’s the time to do it ……

      • I’m just hoping that his heart hasn’t been irretrievably broken.

        In the words of Professor Whitman in the wonderful Community, he reminds me of a younger me. With slightly worse hair.

    • MUCH worse hair, my dear Aba, MUCH worse…

      Big thank you to Sakura for nominating me, and thanks to the Academy, my family, my friends, the guy who wrote the script, JKR for writing such wonderful books that have given me an opportunity to act, and God… Actually, scratch that last one…

      Maki, they do have interweb connectivity in my little slice of suburban Hell, but alas in the two weeks immediately after my stint as guru I had no time for anything but essays and after that I was forced by circumstances to retreat to my bunker under the Rock of Cashel armed with Avengers Assemble, the X-Men box set, my CD collection and the complete works of JRR Tolkien. And no, I wasn’t sitting out December 21st so much as abdicating from my social and personal responsibilities until bits of my brain stopped hurting 😀

      By the way, is that picture at the top of the post a still from Iron Skies?

      • It’s that generation gap again… Do you see any swastikas? It’s Space 1999, one of my favourite tv shows from the recently deceased Gerry Anderson.

    • Accepting this award on the behalf of forty-odd faceless political whores, I’d just like to say that –
      Normally I’m a big believer that if you don’t use your vote, you have no right to complain at whatever you get. However, in the case of the elections for Police Commissioners, I’m prepared to excuse myself. Did any of you lot know what your options were, over and above the obvious main Party candidates? I didn’t, thanks to Cameron’s ridiculous decision to force the elections through without allowing the candidates access to publicity funding. His contempt for us seems to have no bounds. Mine for him should not detract from my seriously-held belief that a 15% turnout should actually legally require a null-and-void result to be declared. Sadly, as per everything else these days, it appears what we think matters not a toss.

  26. Don’t care…I’ve started…

    Self- Congratulatory Award (nommed by Chris and me)

    The RR Community for carrying on regardless!

    With special mention to the Guest Gurus, one of whom was of course moi MWAH ! ! !

  27. Hey, linearity was yesterday. Maybe we can dress this up as a satirical commentary on the Grauniad’s new nested comments system.

  28. And FINALLY before I go…Artist Of The Year is saneshane, nominated by DsD, for fabulous T shirts – I would be wearing mine only it doesn’t go with this ensemble ! ! ! MWAH ! ! !

    Right, I’m outa here. DsD is attempting to do Album Of The Year for ya.

  29. Now moving on to the much-more feted Event Of The Year:

    In third place:

    The US Presidential Election

    Though if we DO fall off the proverbial cliff, that may get a post-year boost in the rankings.

    • This is a positive award. So I’ll bite my tongue over the outrageous scam perpetrated on us over the allocation and sale of tickets. That aside, London 2012 applied a flaming Olympic torch to my fears and cynicism, and I believe we put on one hell of a show. I honestly had believed that the reason we got the Games and Paris didn’t was because the IOC were sure that whoever followed Beijing would look cheap and silly. Well, in terms of silly, Danny Boyle may have made them think they had a point, but as far as I’m concerned, the Games themselves were brilliant, superb, and in no way a letdown after the OTT Chinese blowout.

      • Can i disagree on the Danny Boyle thing? or only if you’re implying that ‘silly’ (for which one could read ‘original’, ‘subversive’ and ‘remarkably lacking in the usual bombast’) was a bad thing…

      • No, no, no. I was implying the watching world may have looked at Boyle’s show and thought “WTF?”, but no more.

      • The watching world (well the Spanish bit, anyway) found the OC to be idiosyncratically British, a little self important but ultimately far less bombastic than just about any that had gone before: they liked it.

    • Miles away as we were we loved both ceremonies (esp opening) and despite not being able to follow much on TV as we were on holiday, I have to say that that the Spanish media, which are not overly pro-British were very positive about the whole thing. As an ex-pat it was one of the few times that you got only positive comments from your neighbours.

  30. And now, after that confusing double-presenter fight for the mic, I’m handing over, for the award for TV Show Of The Year, to …. er, no-one, as Mnemonic is currently at home taking a lumphammer to her modem!

    * Looks at the Prof, and mouths the word “HELP!” *

  31. Okay, I think I’d better take this one on, in the best tradition of doing the show that must go on right here and damn the torpedoes. Despite the fact that I’m trying to hold a simultaneous text message conversation cum argument with Mrs Abahachi, and I scarcely watch any television anyway apart from Strictly Come Dancing, Masterchef and Doctor Who

    • Here are the winners of TV Show of the Year!! None of which I have seen for more than ten minutes, but never mind. Incidentally, I am genuinely touched that people other than me mentioned the Why Poverty? series of which I was a minor part – I thought it was a great series, even if the two hours of interview I gave was cut down to a brief summary of the plot of a Greek comedy I vaguely remember, something that probably has legions of genuine specialists in Athenian culture thirsting for my blood…

      3rd: Fresh Meat

      2nd: The Thick of It

      1st: The Bridge

      Okay, Llama, can you do the Films?

  32. Reading the synopsis of our third place movie, it sounds like a cross between Dallas and The Blues Brothers. No humans were harmed during the making of ………

  33. Perhaps the most seen of the nominated films is our second place movie, which even the ladyllama’s dad has seen. He loved it so much he decided to blurt out the ending to us – for those like me who haven’t seen it, I can reveal that M £&08970743gklfa{{]]]];.fiyfr%£^(90

    *sound of the ladyllama applying a hammer to the home hub*

  34. This year’s Spill Movie Of The Year has been described by The Guardian’s Peter Bradshaw as “a moving, terrifying and uncompromising drama of extraordinary intimacy and intelligence”. Surprisingly he wasn’t talking about Piranha 3DD.

  35. Michael Haneke movies always make for less than comfortable viewing but are all the more rewarding for that. His study of the effect of dementia on a family is our top pick. Ladies and Gentlemen it’s Amour !

  36. *hastily redrafted link*

    Speaking of Amour, doesn’t it look something like our very own DsD ? Hope you like my Michael Schenker hairdo – couldn’t do the Flying V though…

  37. * DsD dashes onto the stage holding the hastily-printed email of AotY results he had to hunt down on about page 4 of his Inbox. *

    • Worth noting that the shortlist of ten albums was put together from the, erm, ten albums that received more than one nomination, with another 90+ albums being mentioned once only in people’s Best Of 2012 lists. Scarcely any of which seemed to overlap with the Grauniad’s Top 100…

  38. In a joint third place were:
    Tame Impala with Lonerism;
    Alabama ShakesBoys and Girls album; and
    Godspeed You! Black Emperor with their return LP Hallelujah! Don’t Bend Ascend,

    Um, none of which I have.

  39. In second place: Mark Lanegan Band: Blues Funeral
    Yes, a DsD fave artist, and an album very much of his own, rather than the collaborations he’s been busy with since Bubblegum.

  40. And so, to the surprise of no-one who’s been keeping up to this week’s conversations both here and over on the mothership:

    The 2012 Spill Award for music Album Of The Year goes to:

  41. As last year’s winners of Spill series of the year Mrs Maki and I would like to unofficially hand the award over to Pairubu and Sakura for their highly entertaining and wonderfully tongue in cheek He Said:She Said, which brought a lot of music from less regularly visited realms to the attention of the ‘Spill.

  42. I think the phone is about to go. Thank to you everyone who’s participated this evening, especially our lovely presenters of awards; love and kisses to all absent friends in other time zones, and see you all soon. It has, as ever, been a blast. Safe re-entry.

    • If you click on the photo, you might recognise it, purchased from Honley Co-op on Christmas Eve. Didn’t taste that honey-ish, but Fraser and I both enjoyed it…

      • Speaking as a pedantic home brewer and ex-beekeeper, my immediate thought is that honey mainly consists of fermentable sugars, so its contribution to beer flavour would be relatively limited, plus British (or even European) honey is horribly expensive at the moment because of a series of poor summers, so I’d be worried that you were drinking dodgy Asian honey… Sorry, I’ll shut up now.

      • You’re right I’m sure, and I would never have known it was made with honey from the taste. As a marketing ploy for people whose principal drinking companions are teddy bears, it’s unbeatable.

    • You should get a ‘Spill Zeitgeist Award for that, Carole…and I get the Sam Fox Award for my attempts at messing up the running order. Hooray for everyone, and three for Abahachi!

      • Ha! I guess that makes me Mick “Rabbit-caught-in-headlights” Fleetwood, ‘cept with six inches taken off the height and added round the waist.

  43. That’s the first Spill thread I’ve ever read that was actually enhanced by wearing my 3D glasses. Y’all look great in a tux.

  44. Well, Prof, your Skull and Bones get-together was scintillating alright. Maybe next time you could have a few categories dedicated to the music that’s actually been discovered through the year on RR. I’m sure there are a few posters who could still unearth a few gems they hadn’t previously heard e.g most enjoyable topic, favourite track etc…

    And El Cid? You’re just not amusing old boy.

    • The problem as far as the awards are concerned is narrowing things down enough that there can be a halfway-sensible vote – which inevitably drags things to the lowest common denominator and annoys people like Shoey. Better, I think, would be a separate thread in which people can talk about their favourite new discoveries – we have this for rediscoveries, since they aren’t eligible for Album of the Year, and there’s no reason at all why we couldn’t have one for new music as well. Fancy writing it? I’m a bit posted out after this week.

  45. I’m sure Maki’s Troll Hunter movie will get the nod next year though. Have to admit to once again being miffed at the official ‘Spill best album selections – democracy is over-rated.

    • Happens every year, and is pretty well inevitable as long as we’re trying to find any common ground between our very varied preferences – only one of my ten favourite non-jazz albums this year got anywhere near the shortlist.

  46. you had ten favourite non-jazz albums?
    Knock yourself out, daddio. But don’t let any of them touch my turntable, man. I just had Mulligan on there.

      • Neither… I’m just astounded you had that many… we may have to review your membership of RR Jazz Friends and Lovers… though I’ll have to do the minutes myself if we do kick you out, so that might not be a very clever idea…

      • In my defence, I would like the court to note that I did maintain an explicit distinction between my jazz and non-jazz favourites, rather than starting out on the slippery slope that claims they’re all music, man. Though obviously GF would maintain than half my jazz favourites aren’t really jazz either…

      • I guess we’ll let you off with that then, at least you bought something… I don’t think I even bought ten “new” albums this year, and they were nearly all piano trios. I seem to be indulging in “slow music” more and more these days… it takes me about a month before I feel like I actually “know” anything, and I hate to own albums I don’t really like much.

        Though it was another particularly good year for piano trios, I thought… I tried to restrain myself on the Festive Spill; in other contexts I’d certainly have included tracks from Michael Wollny’s Wasted & Wanted, and Enrico Pieranunzi’s Permutation.

  47. Pingback: A Richard Hawley Retrospective « The 'Spill

  48. Hope you all had as much fun with this as it seems! Was certainly a fun read even *counts on fingers* however many days later.

    tx Ab for your annual travails. A portion of the proceeds still goes to charity, right? Free Jazz Benvolent Fund again this year, or does your smoker need a new part?

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