opportunities – advertising our influences on the RR Guest Guru T-shirt.


1 Heaven’S On Fire The Radio Dept.
2 Surrender To Strangeness Buck 65
3 Click Citizen Fish
4 Fuel Ani DiFranco
5 Sink to the Beat Cursive
6 Merchandise Fugazi
7 Submarine Black Grape


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1 Estate Sale Sign The Mountain Goats
2 Too Much Sex (Too Little Jesus) Drive-By Truckers
3 Pussy Galore The Roots
4 Sell Yourself Cage The Elephant
5 Metaphysical Handsome Boy Modeling School Feat. Miho Hatori & Mike D
6 Slow Down Ghandi Sage Francis
7 Commercial Fucking Suicide (Part 1) Carter USM


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1 Who The Fuck Are Arctic Monkeys? Arctic Monkeys
2 Step Into A World (Raptures Delight) KRS-One
3 Target Fugazi
4 Zerox Adam & The Ants
5 Covert Advertising Slow Gherkin
6 Sold As Seen I Am Kloot
7 The Human Jungle The Jazz Butcher


So, I once designed an ad that had a ‘dumper truck’ on the left side of the magazine spread – can you see where I’m going here – on the other side (with the little photo of some teenagers stinky deodorant) was a ‘pick-up truck’ – deep and meaningful don’t you think?

Advertising – it is big, but others might have made it clever, not me.

They wouldn’t let me write: hey stinky teenage boy, do you sweat like Buster Bloodvessel in a sauna? then use our crap – it smells like mouldy cheese in a heatwave – females will avoid you like the plague – ergo, you will not start stressing and sweating – job done.
If you do want to learn how to converse with the opposite (or indeed the same sex)-
just wash with unperfumed soap – learn breathing techniques to keep calm and look them in the eyes. It’s free – they will be as nervous as you. But at least you bumbling words and honest eye contact will be thought about – not the fucking awful can of ozone destroying spay that you’ve covered yourself in.
But that wouldn’t make any money.
I didn’t last long in advertising – I still don’t make any money – but you guessed that.
I do get my kicks for free.

step right up, step right up – unique buying opportunity (you’ve got the brains – I’ve got the looks) let’s make this kind of funny.

The collected RR Guest Guru Book – ready for a Christmas.

this might explain the choices:
1 Heaven’s On Fire The Radio Dept.

2 Surrender To Strangeness Buck 65
Lost without a marketing plan and a stylist

3 Click Citizen Fish
Quality is something never advertised.

4 Fuel Ani DiFranco
Playing music in a room
Now everything is cross-marketing
It’s about sunglasses and shoes
Or guns or drugs.

5 Sink to the Beat Cursive
4/4 hip hop and you don’t stop
this unique approach to start an EP
intended to shock, create a mystique
a cheap strategy, a marketing scheme
building awareness for the next LP
they’ve got a good fan base
they’ve got integrity
they’ve got a DC sound
Shudder to Think, Fugazi
and Chapel Hill Around The Early 90’s
this is the latest from saddle creek.

6 Merchandise Fugazi
merchandise keeps us in line
common sense says it’s by design.

7 Submarine Black Grape
And the boy was so proud of the crocodile on his sock
Someone had to tell him he comes from planet Reebok.

8 Estate Sale Sign – The Mountain Goats
Pennies on the dollar
Everything’s gotta go
The things that we can’t even give away
I don’t wanna know.

9 Too Much Sex (Too Little Jesus) Drive-By Truckers
Now a word from our sponsor then another troubled teen with
Too much sex, too little Jesus.
Stop that dope smoking, stop that masturbation!
Take the Lord into your heart and stop
That fornication.
We’re building us an army, gonna knock out Satan.
Visa or Mastercard, our operators are waiting!

10 Pussy Galore The Roots
Life is about marketing pussy galore
Every time I turn around, there’s more pussy galore
Corporations going to war over the pussy galore
Even the cash could afford all the pussy galore
Yo, gang wars, more pussy galore
From the screen to the record stores, pussy galore

11 Sell Yourself Cage The Elephant
And if the money’s right, you think I’d just agree?
So sad to see you torn apart by all your selfish greed.

12 Metaphysical Handsome Boy Modeling School Feat. Miho Hatori & Mike D
reflective imagery burned into the cornea of
inter-dimensional trans-global marketing schemes
lube, dreams culminating over frontlobal poetry
intertwining sheet music epic in proportion

13 Slow Down Ghandi Sage Francis
That clever ad campaign ain’t worth
The time taken from minimum wage labor;
I don’t care how half-naked or fake she looks,
She smells like dirty cash and aged paper books.
What would she die for?
Slow down Gandhi, you’re killin’ em
Slow down Gandhi, you’re killin’ em.

14 Commercial Fucking Suicide (Part 1) Carter USM
And just to keep you on toes
A soundtrack to go with the clothes
Created by computer kids
And marketing executives

If you buy this record today
It’s not true what the advertisements say
Your life won’t be greatly improved
Oh but Christ, you’ve nothing to lose
And we’ve got so much to gain.

15 Who The Fuck Are Arctic Monkeys? Arctic Monkeys
But we’ll stick to the guns
Don’t care if it’s marketing suicidal
Won’t crack or compromise
Your do-rights or individes
Will never unhinge us

16 Step Into A World (Raptures Delight) KRS-One
Stop wastin your money on marketing schemes
and pretty packages pushin dreams to the beams
A dope MC is a dope MC
With or witout a record deal, all can see
And that’s who KRS be son
I’m not the run of mill, cause for the mill I don’t run
And you don’t ask why
Give me the sex and travel
Down in the human jungle

17 Target Fugazi
18 Zerox Adam & The Ants
19 Covert Advertising Slow Gherkin
20 Sold As Seen I Am Kloot

21 The Human Jungle The Jazz Butcher
See the babies ride in unmarked cars
Then the advert brothers stumble in
Watch the telly, do the ironing
All those ladies never learn a thing
What can you say when it comes on down

About these ads

16 thoughts on “opportunities – advertising our influences on the RR Guest Guru T-shirt.

  1. Thanks Shane – enjoyed that. The Radio Dept, Ani DiF, DBT, Cage The Elephant, Arctic Monkeys and The Jazz Butcher advertised themselves particularly well.

    The Black Grape track is a shameless rip-off of Loaded, isn’t it? (With just a touch of Like A Rolling Stone for good measure) That’s not a criticism.

    • Black Grape knocked out songs between being hospitalised through drug intake and falling out with each other – wasn’t really enough time to be original – but they are entertaining.

      In my world Neil Armstrong has “balls bigger than King Kong” written on his headstone.

      when Kermit recovered from touring with Black Grape he released an album called ‘Solid Nourishment’ – that’s entertaining too ….

      cheers for listening.

    • I always thought ‘Raptures Delight’ was clever – jazz butcher and black grape are winning.

      cheers for popping in – ice creams and kiora will be for sale during the intervals.

      • I became aware of the blog via the VOR brasocadt. It’s great to see that people of like mind are taking the time to raise awareness about our role and place within the natural world. This is a much needed perspective.

  2. The advert brothers! Makes me think of Saatchi and Saatchi? Isn’t there a song about them? Remember their poster “Labour isn’t working”? The level of deceit contained in that line. Especially when you think about what happened next.

    I quite like adverts, so I was pleased to nom a positive song like FM Belfast’s.

    A fine indie and rap list. I like Citizen Fish more and more.

    Cheerio for now.

    • at collage I wrote a dissertation on the use of ‘fine art photography in advertising and on album covers’ – just because my tutors looked down their noses at such ‘pop’ culture.

      advertising and branding can be done wonderfully – it can also be crap – but it’s just like everything else – One thinks something is crap and one thinks something is brilliant – and that becomes just a question of personal taste.

      Ads are just a form of creativity – good or bad – I have the term blipvert (condensed ads) stuck in my head now – where’s that from?

      quick goo… gives me:
      Max Headroom: 20 Minutes into the Future
      loved that – where was I?

      The Saatchi & Saatchi agency created the Pregnant Man ad for Health Education Council to promote the use of contraceptives; “Would you be more careful if it was you that got pregnant?” and it made their company. So, which one of them came up with the brilliant print ad?
      That’s right – Jeremy Sinclair a young copywriter.
      Saatchi & Saatchi weren’t working either – but they made a shed load out of the grafters.
      There’s a lesson here somewhere (that morally I could never follow).

      this was nominated (was it SR?):

      The Magnetic Fields – All She Cares About Is Mariachi

      so go ahead and hire saatchi & saatchi
      to advertise the sausage in your pants
      but all she cares about is mariachi
      and all she ever wants to do is dance

  3. Blipvert, sounds like a Flemish-language MBM-type song that is subliminal to the max.

    Sometimes I have to work for people who represent things I have a hard time accepting. I try to point this out to my employer. This is why I will now spend the next 8 hours looking after my kids when I should be working.

    Must congratulate SR on her Magnetic Fields nom.

    • Good stuff Fuel – the children will appreciate seeing more of you I’m sure – they’re only young once. (Although my two seemed to be very happy about returning to school and the childminder)

      I managed to get made redundant this time last year without actually doing a minutes work for a new company (after my two biggest contracts were transferred to them). I pointed out to the new company that they were legally obliged to pay us the same amount, the same hours and with the same conditions. Being a massive company they found wiggle room from these laws – meaning a whole load of minimum wage workers were shafted.

      Every 3 months I submit another portfolio of photographs detailing their poor work – to the even bigger companies that they rip off – just so they have the information right in front of them when the contracts are up for renewal again…

      I’m still living on a stupidly small amount of money a week – but I have the moral high ground – (i think).

      • That’s my biggest fear at the moment. I actually freelance but, in effect, I have have two main employers. I’m very useful to both of them but I’ve noticed that contracts that I have won for them have resulted in only a little work for me but a whole load of work for “fresh from their studies and cheap to employ” workers. (A salesman recently left one of my employers saying he was too embarressed to continue selling for them, such was the dross that is/was produced.)

        Anyway, when one contract is up for renewal I know it will go elsewhere.

        So, keep documenting the failings and hope that someone, somewhere in the companies concerned cares enough about their image and quality to want to pay a decent wage.

        Oh and the reason I wasn’t working was because I couldn’t handle the sexism xenophobia of a department head. It’s amazing the shit passes for “banter” these days.

  4. Just in the mood for a Fish & Gherkin sandwich. Couldn’t get Cursive to play & don’t think they played that when I saw them. Still not convinced by Ani, but preferred this over the challenge tune. 2 Fugazi’s – why not. Good stuff.

    • ahh – it’s a shame Cursive didn’t play (it’s fine for me by the way) it was sequenced in there on purpose.

      The song was released on an EP – Burst and Bloom – to advertise the upcoming album (the ugly organ – I think) – at the time – (you probably know this) in typical fashion it starts with a hip hop beat – nothing like the album … going on to mention Fugazi – presumably referencing their hatred of the fashionista who wear band tees without knowing about the music.
      They also continue with mentioning Saddle Creek records latest release – that being this very tune. Super knowing within a great tune – so you are saved from wanting to smash the clever gits head against a recording desk.

      My first Fugazi thought was Target – but was beaten to it – so needed to add my own take… that’s why there’s two.

      My Ms. likes Ani Defranco – so it kind of get taken in subliminally – this song/tune is a cracker though – I need to have a better listen to other stuff before I pass judgement.

      I really could have done a whole subhumans / citizen fish/ Culture Shock/ style playlist for this theme.

      • Take your point about being quick to judge. Problem is too little time to dig further into stuff that’s “ok”, but doesn’t really grab your attention.

      • It wasn’t a criticism shoey – I agree totally – but sometimes wonder if I miss the slow building subtler stuff nowadays – just for the quick fix.

        (Oh – I probably liked the quick fix even in the days of tape rewinding – so scratch that!)

      • One of the great things about RR is it forces you to review the dismissed & overlooked in search of a theme fit.

        Built To Spill were ACE – gig of the year so far (& there has been some stiff competition). They didn’t even play my fave song. My beloved music room was packed on a Monday night & a great time was had by all. Bonus: Tennis recorded fine & I was allowed to retain my testicles.

        Coming up: Mono, Why? & Damien Miseryguts.

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