I have been to Bristol for a couple of days to attend the funeral of my friend, Nocker, who died recently. It was a Humanist service at the crematorium, Nocker had planned it all out because he knew his time with us was probably going to be short – born with a cleft palate and heart problems, he hadn’t been expected to leave the hospital after birth, let alone to reach 50. At the end, his music teacher found him collapsed over his keyboard, after he suffered a heart attack. Music he chose for the ceremony included “When the Levee Breaks” (Led Zepp), “Always Look on the Bright Side of Life” and “The Galaxy Song” (Monty Python), and “The Timewarp”, which he had requested that everyone should dance to.
The first time I met him he had shaved his head for charity, apart from a long ginger plait which hung down his back and complimeted the black NHS spectales and his skinny pink frame. He was practising swordsmanship in my friend’s back garden, with another member of the Sealed Knot. He was also a keen biker, and built up his strength so that he could ride and handle his own bikes, as well as taking part in charity rides from Lands End to John O’Groats. His name came from the sound one of his bikes made when the crankshaft (or something technical) fell off. He fought with the Viking re-enactment society too, carrying an extra 3 stone of armour, and was a great character. His brother described him as “a medium rare Cornish pasty … half-baked!”
He loved life, travel, his friends and family, his wife and his cats, not necessarily in that order. There was a great turn-out at the funeral, including a cortege of bikers and friends from the Vikings, the Sealed Knot, the Moonrakers (Tewkesbury) and other bikers from Devizes. Unfortunately someone attending the previous funeral collapsed in the chapel, and we had to wait for an ambulance to pick them up before Nocker’s funeral could go ahead. His brother joked that Nocker would have laughed at being late for his own funeral.
All in all, a life well lived, and although I’m sorry he has gone, I’m proud to have known him. Thanks, Nocker.
Rest in peace. A life well lived and a friendship to treasure. Heartfelt sympathies.
Thanks Maki, kind as always.
Ali
He sounds like a great character, Ali! Sorry for your loss.
His brother described him as “a medium rare Cornish pasty … half-baked!”
Sounds like it was easy to adore Nocker. F*ck, I’d never even been to a funeral until 5 years ago and now I seem to have a plus one quarterly season ticket. Commiserations Ali and I know it’s a big dig in the ribs for us all to make the most of those around us. And not for you in particular, but I once heard the lovely Robin Skynner speak at the bereavement charity Cruse’s AGM and have paid attention to their work ever since, so here’s their link in case anyone ever needs it http://www.crusebereavementcare.org.uk/
Timewarp – what a brill idea!
Ali – so beautifully written I almost feel I know him. I’m sorry for your loss. Thank you for this post. It feels so hopeful despite everything.
Donds, donds, and thrice donds.
Very sorry to hear it Ali.
Oh Ali I am so sorry for you loss.
He sounds like a wonderful man with a great spirit and humour. It is a to privilege to know such people.
I am sure he is at peace and in heaven now and happy to know how much you loved him.
Sorry to hear of your loss. He sounds like a really great guy.
Thanks to everyone who has commented, he was a great guy, which is why i felt moved to blog something. It’s so nice to find someone who never takes life for ganted and does his best to enjoy very minute of it (whilst caring for others in the process). A super bloke.
After Maki’s post, mine is another late contribution made redundant by what’s already been expressed and, Ali, yours is another wonderful tribute. I don’t know when “salt of the earth” became a cliche but, before that happened, it must have been a powerful way of describing an affinity with all those things that bind us together, that build community and that have done so for centuries. If we can breathe life back into the phrase for a moment, Nocker truly sounds like a salt of the earth character.
Yes, he was – that’s a brilliant way of putting it. Someone who makes you look at your own petty concerns and re-evaluate. Thank you!
Condolences from me too. Quite a contrast to the tunes I posted recently, but they sound just right for him. It sounds like he didn’t waste time worrying about being unconventional !